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While I was doing research for , the biggest complaint I heard from Christian women was that Christian men weren't assertive enough.

They described men who drove them crazy by calling and hanging around while never asking them out on a real date.

It's not terrorism, economic recession, global warming or gasoline prices that could hit per gallon by the time you're done reading this.

These things might worry you, but something else makes your palms sweat and your pulse hit triple digits: asking someone out on a date.

"I've come to this conclusion: If I ask you out, or if you ask me out, and it's just the two of us, and we're doing something at a set time (like grabbing dinner or brunch or heading to a movie or a museum), then it's a date.

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You remain stuck in the "friend zone," which is relationship purgatory if you have a crush on someone.That's because asking someone out involves potential pain. Worst of all, you engage in the most banal and abysmal of non-dates-going to coffee.If the object of your affection becomes aware of your intentions, he or she might not reciprocate, and that's going to hurt. Instead of asking someone out on a date and being bold in their intentions, they turn to the soggy milquetoast alternative to dating: "hanging out."Here's how it works: you like someone but you're afraid to let him or her know. It has the trappings of a date—a cozy ambiance, comforting beverages, atmospheric music—while allowing everyone involved to disavow the actual occurrence of a date. Does dinner between two people who want to get to know each other even have a anymore?He says that, in the past, he's dated girls who are just as confused.However, I had a lot of fun recently interviewing singles of different ages and places as to their definition of what constitutes a “date” versus “hanging out.” Sound familiar? But I think that depends on how you handle things emotionally, and what your expectations are.) Jessica: A date is when two people, having common interests, participate in a mutually decided upon activity with the intent to analyze each other’s words, actions, and suitability for eternal companionship …my opinion of course. Jennifer: In order to clarify with men about if we are on a date, if a man asks me to hang out with them I ask “you mean like on a date? They will clarify for me and then I can decide do I want to hang or date. Paul: I agree with Jessica, but would add, that is what I would say from a religious standpoint and it is regardless of whether the intent is there to analyze those things…

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